I’ve wanted
to go on the Civil Rights Pilgrimage since my freshman year of college, even
before I was an African American Studies minor writing my senior thesis on Hip
Hop’s constant dialogue with racial oppression. I spend most of my time talking
about privilege and marginalization and make mindful decisions to spend my days
with those that are like-minded or educating my peers that are willing to
listen. The major danger of living this way is that I am consistently
frustrated and discouraged by the raging socialized oppression that lives in
the hearts and minds of people across America, Illinois and this campus.
What I see
in Martin Luther King, Jr.’s Letter from Birmingham Jail and Barack Obama’s
Race Speech are similar sentiments of impatience and anger. What they both
attempt to do is to step back and justify their cause, course of action and the
simple existence of their racial identities. Through gritted teeth, it seems,
they make meaning of their experiences to individuals more privileged and ignorant
than they are and do so, incredibly, with tact and eloquence. Although I
identify as white, I find that I am forced to make the same justifications that
they are, although in different forms. As a woman, I must explain constantly
why rape culture slowly kills women, why my eating disorder is valid and
deserves attention and societal change, and why the cat calls I receive on warm
nights on Green Street are not, in fact, compliments, but rather very scary
warnings against walking alone. As a member of the queer community, I
consistently have to slow down and explain that my genitalia, sexual activity
and specific identities are none of their business while dealing with
homophobic slurs, hate mail and verbal harassment. As a curvy woman I feel the
need to explain why I deserve to breath air, to take up space and that I am,
indeed, fit and healthy in a world where my size defines my worth. And although
comparing marginalization is neither constructive, nor necessary, I believe
that my experiences put me closer to the way that Dr. King felt in Birmingham
or how Obama feels every time he makes a speech. It makes me feel less alone
and more motivated to act.
That is
part of the reason that I chose to go on this Pilgrimage. I wanted to learn
more about a history that continues to fascinate, bewilder and prod me. I want
to move outside of my own identities in order to become aware of the struggles
faced around me, especially those that seem distant to me. I want to be able
to, with more conviction and confidence, slow down and speak my mind like Dr.
King and President Obama have and encourage others on campus, in my home
community, and in my future careers to do the same. It is imperative at a time
when shocking social disparities exist under the guises of a “post-racial,
post-sexist, post-classist” America. I hope this trip is just one more reason
to wake up every day ready for social justice.
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